Monday, January 24, 2011

83. Terasa Kurang Sihat.. :(


Bismillahirrahmanirrahim..
Assalamualaikum and Very Good Day Readers..!

Ahlan..!

How are you today peeps..?! Aku..? terasa kurang sihat. sigh.. (+_+).

Aku tak taula kenapa hati aku terasa xsedap je.

Selalu rasa sedih, down, frustrated, uncomfortable, worried, dan perasaan2 yang tak berapa enak yg sewaktu dengannya.. =.'=

Semalam, seorang lagi kaum keluargaku pergi menghadap Ilahi.

Innalillahi wa inna ilaihiraji'un..

Mati itu pasti. Bila dan bagaimana hanya Allah Maha Mengetahui.

Kita yang hidup ini sudah bersediakah..?! Apakah sudah cukup amalan untuk di persembahkan kepada Pencipta..? Sempurnakah segala ibadah kita..? Allahuakbar.. Astaghfirullah..>>

Peeps..!

Actually nothing that really important need to update. Just wanna express all out about my irritating feelings.Fuhhh.. It's really incredible okay..! :'(

Aku rase sebab jam biologi aku dah xbetol. Apa taknye org tido aku jage, org jage aku tido. Tapi serius la aku tak tau kenapa aku tak bole nak tido mlm2. Almost 4-5 baru aku dapat tido. Jage subuh pon pening2 lalat pastu zzzzzzzzzzz. Owh spastic seh. =".=

Readers..!

Aku terasa rindu zaman dulu. Zaman hati yang masih suci dari kekotoran.

Tapi masa tak mungkin kembali. Malah terus berlalu dan berlalu tanpa kembali.

How I wish..?!

I did well during my UPSR 
so that I may get enroll into SBP..

I did well during my secondary time,

I did well during my SPM time, 
so that I may further my study at oversea..

or maybe I did well during those early years in undergraduate at IIUM.
so I may recognized by lecturer and get better opportunity..

Then, I won't suffer now. 

Hard to get job.. 
make my parents worries so much even they don't put in words 
but I realize they do worry so damn much.

Hard to obtain any position..
make myself so numb
too cold to make any movement in my life
leave all those 4 years knowledge, skills that I struggling before.
I am worry,
am I still remember what I suffer for 4 years back..?
am I still have all those kind of senses to learn it back..?
am I good enough..?!

Hard to acquire any works..
make all wonderful that should I enjoyed turn to unexciting.
Home is where the heart is rite..?
But after so much questions being asking..
"Buat apa sekarang..?", "Dah keja ke belum?", "bila nak kenduri.."
Argh........ 
all those are getting on my nerves..!!
make me glued to the spot.. Shut..!!!!

So peeps..!

tell me what should I do..?
Because think like all I state above it's nonsense rite..?!
I should not dwell to past..!
I should move on and move on.
Because..
Allah already plan for us perfectly.
we wouldn't know what will happen in the future rite..?!

Tapi...

Sebagai hamba yang sering naik dan turun iman..

Aku rasa terbeban, sedih dan feel unbearably the consequences.

Astaghfirullahhhhhhhh.... :'(

Aku mohon sokongan mu teman,
aku pohon kekuatan hati dan kesabaran hidup yg jitu..!

Ya allah.. kau sabarkanlah hati ku ini.
aku tidak mahu menjadi hamba-Mu yg tidak menyukuri nikmat-Mu..

"Gardens are not made by sitting in the shade..!"

Bilakah aku mahu lakukan Tajdid..? Berkali-kali hati aku berazam tapi selalu hanya di separuh jalan. Ya Allah hanya pada-Mu aku memohon pertolongan. Sesungguhnya hanya Engkau tempat aku bergantung. Hanya Engkaulah penolongku.

Readers..!

Dah la aku mengarut sekali sekala, dua kali dua kala. hu3. Mengarut gila post aku. Tapi dah aku nak all out kan. Nah amik ko..!

Rite dearie should pen off. Till we meet again..!

Thanks for reading..
Take care.. (^.^)

p/s: ignore all those grammatical error..pliss..!

Ma'assalamah wa ilal liqa'..:)

Thanks for reading. Take care (^_^)

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

salam sister,
not only but other also feel the same thing....
i work hard for my life. I study hard since secondary school by the hope that my life will better/ will change

but what comes now totally different...it's make me feel pressure, tension and useless towards my family....keep ur faith in Allah...

wsalam

little caliph said...

Dear anonymous,
let us pray to the Almighty Allah together. Always trust in Him because He knows everything. He knows what is the best for us.

As a human being, it's normal to face all those incredible feelings. But, never loose hope in HIM. I believe Allah will give the best way for us. He will answer our prayer in the right time. Insya-Allah.

" boleh jadi kamu tidak menyenangi sesuatu, padahal itu baik bagimu, dan boleh jadi kamu menyukai sesuatu, padahal itu tidak baik bagimu. Allah mengetahui, sedang kamu tidak mengetahui..."[2:216].

Allah dah tetapkan rezeki untuk setiap orang. Cuma cepat atau lambat.

So, never give up. Keep our faith in HIM. Insya-Allah. It's advice for me also. :)

Thank you for dropping by. Be strong.

Wallahu'alam.. :)